Goal
Based Motivation
A man dies and found himself in a beautiful
place, surrounded by every conceivable comfort. A white
jacketed man came to him and said, "You may have anything
you choose - any food - any pleasure - any kind of entertainment."
The man was delighted, and for many days he sampled all
the delicacies and experiences of which he had dreamed on
earth. But one day he grew bored with all of it, and calling
the attendant to him, he said, "I'm tired of all this. I
need something to do. What kind of work can you give me?"
The attendant sadly shook his head and replied, "I'm sorry
sir. That's one thing we can't do for you. There is no work
here for you."
To which the man answered, "That's a fine thing. I might
as well be in hell."
The attendant said softly, "Where do you think you are?"
If I can summarise my five years of experience
of working with children in one line then I would say, “Children
love to work, to do, to learn. Work is a fundamental need
we all have. However, one needs to understand that work
is a mean, not an end. When we say you should do your homework
well, the homework becomes the end in itself. However, if
you say for you to become a great scientist you need to
do the homework well , then (provided I want to become a
great scientist) I will go ahead and do the homework nicely.
TV watching seems to be the biggest child related problem
in urban house holds. My contention is that children watch
TV because they have nothing better to do!. If you want
me not to watch TV, give me something which is more exciting
to do. And what is exciting to be motivating should be meaningful.
And what is meaningful to be motivating should be challenging.
And what is challenging to be motivating should be achievable.
Each one of us have our own motivation
to do the work which we hold so dear! As adults we submerge
our days, night and sometimes weekends in work. And the
motivation comes from our goals, the sense of achievement
we get by achieving what we set out for. The trick then
is to set challenging goals, show how they are meaningful,
and let my ingenuity take over the effort to achieve them.
Here are some guidelines to do
this goals based motivation with children:
First - Check and set positive beliefs – both in your mind and children’s mind. Believe that your
child wants to do lot of work (this is specially true when
you child is not doing). Because only if you believe then
you can only the following steps. If you believe that your
child isn’t that kind – you will soon give up.
Make the goals
Meaningful:
Have you noticed how effortlessly
child learned their mother tongue or learned how to walk.
Simply because they wanted it so much. Many goals seem artificial
to children – specially the way we create “shoulds” around
them. My favourite is “you should learn history". The way
it was presented to me (when I was a child), it was quite
meaningless. However, in Geniekids when we gave the children
the task of comparing ‘being a king’ to ‘being a prime minister’
– children not only could relate it to their life and hence
wanted to know more about kings and their kingdoms, but
also thoroughly enjoyed it.
Make the goals
exciting:
This is easy as when children set their own goals they are
pretty excited about them. So the key is to let children
set their own goals. The key to children setting goals is
to give choice. Do you want to make a book about whales,
make a power point presentation about them, or a dance drama
show about them or a collage in clay! (Give this option
to a seven year old and he will turn the world of whales
upside down). Surprisingly this can be done with almost
any topic. Moreover, excitement is contagious. If we also
show excitement about their goals it adds to the effect.
Make the
goals challenging, yet achievable:
This requires a little hit and trial approach. Which means
it requires us to be flexible. Because what is simply achievable
by one, might be a lot challenging to another. The rule
is whatever the child guns for ask him or her to write it
down – in specific detail. Writing brings clarify between
the guide and the doer (parent and the child). While this
may look obvious this is also the most obviously overlooked
step. Check out the difference between: “I want to make
a doll house” and “I want to make a doll house at least
big enough for my these two dolls, with at least three rooms,
a garden and a place to store all my dolls items”. Another
example – compare: “I will come score more than 80% in 8th
standard" and “I will score more than 90 in English and
Science, more than 80 in Maths and Social Studies and more
than 70 in Hindi. Moreover I will study enough to be able
to maintain these percentages in across all tests and I
will spend more time on English and science as I like them”.
Successful people are
not only more diligent but importantly know for what they
are working. Since their goals are clear, they are more
persevering, more resilient and more focused. And most importantly
they enjoy what they are doing. The work is not work, but
joy!
Also remember, "Progress has little
to do with speed, but much to do with direction".
By Ratnesh & Aditi Mathur
For
www.geniekids.com
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