Firmness
What is it?
Establishing what is acceptable and unacceptable. (Sometimes the children may not understand fully why something is not acceptable. While this can be explained - finally we have to train them to "know" and follow this by default.
When do we use?
In situations that demand safety - material, physical, emotional.
eg;child climbing stairs- has to hold the railing for safety- child may not understand the reason, but still has to hold the railing for safety.
How do we use?
Through consistency - mostly with our mouths closed. This is the core of firmness - the moment we start giving a lecture - the whole effect of firmness goes away - the IMPACT is because we are MUM.
We also use Non-verbal signs
If at all we need to be verbal- we use a pre - established rhyme or chant about the issue - like " I Hold, I hold, I hold .. the railing .. whenever i am on stairs).
We may also point the child to a pre-fixed visual of what is acceptable.
But the real key and the essence of firmness is CONSISTANTTLY doing the same thing with MOUTH shut!
To be firm as a facilitator
i guess to be FIRM you as a facilitator needs to be clear WHY are you doing this.
If you think the holding railing is for safety of the child not an instruction to follow then you are genuinely firm
respect of the material comes form your heart not an instruction to follow and so on
when you believe in something the FIRMNESS becomes natural - when you do as an instruction to follow it becomes "force" in the class - for you as well as for kids :(.
So if you do not believe in any firmness code - please talk/ clarify/ discuss
Consistancy
In our session, stationary was being thrown around the whole class. In circle time we decided how to take care of the stationary-we will take in apple basket. keep it back etc. Visuals were also drawn and put up. All of us will together will clean up the place. one particular genie was still throwing it around and everytime he did it visual was shown and together we used to clean up( my talking was on) but consistantly showed the visuals. After a reminder on MUM only visual and non verbal action has helped in the genie taking the stationary and he showing everyone that he is keeping back the stationary.
Firmness
In our class we stick to what we planned through setting codes like taking toys in a apple basket and we are firm when some take it with out apple basket and show the child through visuals or appreciating others who follow the codes or some time through asking questions or yes MY AUDITORY ALSO HAPPENS , If we are breaking the codes or hurting others feelings Aunty is firm and shares what she feels to the group, we are working on empowering children to be firm on understanding each others feeling when they and hurting each other by informing others some time we work as a team if something is not happening as per planned and be firm on what we planned and stick to it till we compleat the same before moving to the next acty eg- cleaning up the class before going to snacks
In the class
Following methods are followed to solve the behavioral
issues.
1. To avoid kids pulling/pushing and pinching each
other, One of the
Concept we follow in our class is, we have introduced
a pushing corner
through a puppet.
When kids intend to push or pull somebody
1. First they are being separated,
2. They are given an alternate option to go to the
pushing corner and
They can push the wall so that their friends are not
hurt.
2. When the pushing /pulling is suspected to happen,
Aunty Uses the Word "Friends-hug" and relating this word throuh picture. Most of
the times pushing /pulling stops there.
3. General codes are set on the class about taking care of stationary rack, sitting and snacks mats.
4. If the kids try to tap on their friend's head, we give the alternate option of tapping on the wall and making music. This is done through nonverbally, through relating to the pictures showing tapping on the wall and rhythms coming out.
5. If a kid gets hurt due to another child - the hurt child is first accepted by making hi or her sit with aunty and hugged. The child is given some time to express their feelings (hurt) to his / her friend from whom he / she got the hurt.
Regarding empowerin children:
1. If a child cries when he or she enters, - she is offered paper and pencil and encourged and involved in his / her own work. This settles the child and hlps them getting ready for
the sunshine time.
For eg, a child today came with fun work showing straws inserted on her hip. When she came to the sunshine time, straws were explored by her friends and this made her upset and this continued when she came to the class from there .She came to me for help and I asked her through picture what she wants to do and she told she doesn’t want to give to her friend. I asked her again what can we do now and without replying to me she went and
kept it on her bag and told "I don’t want to give".
2. Children are empowered through
1."we are strong, We will open our snacksbox, water
bottles, putting our bags on our own and which really working with her.
2. working with children thorugh visuals & nonverbally, - this helps children to express to her/his friend about the hurt.
Things that we are going to be working on are
1. Catch children when they are taking care of themselves; look
for as many times as he / she does that. Reinforcing this
by cheering, giving tangibles like pictures from
magazines (in shape of small cards with captions
written on them).
2. Using visual, auditory, and kinesthetic methods to
empower.
Eg: Tool box with strengths written on different
paper tools, chants and jigs to emphasis strengths,
body movements like high 5, thumbs up.
When I started working on the empowerment of one child,
I observed another child caring for her friend when she
fell down, and was speaking to her about the hurt.
I gave this supportive child a paper tool about caring for the friend,
The first child came to me saying “give me also” and I took
another paper tool and asked her “what should I
write?” and she told specifically about one kid and
told aunty to write that she will take care of him. :-)
What to do NOT not to do
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